On my way to Surulere, I took a BRT bus to Ojuelegba. I ensured I was well seated where it’s most comfortable.
Enjoying the cool morning breeze, while the driver was saddled with navigating the ever chaotic Lagos roads, I began to appreciate why people have drivers or someone to drive them.
You would just relax while someone else is sweating it out! But driving your car and business at the same time is suicide!
Anyway, back to my story.
The bus made a brief stop at Maryland for passengers to alight and get on.
I was sitting a row away behind the driver, watching as new passengers entered the bus for no particular reason. You just want to sha look.
Anyway, a young kid of probably 6 or 7 years old came in, looked around the bus and made himself comfortable directly behind the driver.
Holy Mary! Who on earth allowed such a boy join public transport on his own, I thought to myself.
The bus continued its journey while all passengers seemed settled.
But not for long!
Suddenly, the kid started yelling.
“If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow, I’d be a little bull,” the little guy shouted.
Everyone’s attention was diverted toward him.
After the initial shock, I resettled my mind and remembered my daughter. Possibly that was how their aunties at school taught them to recite their home activities.
But the bus driver wouldn’t just have it!
Not when our little rebel wouldn’t just stop.
“If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.”
The boy rebel continued on this with different animals until the driver got very angry and yelled at the boy,
“What if your dad was gay and your mom was a prostitute?!”
The kid looked around the now very quiet bus, smiled, stood up and shouted right into the ears of the driver from behind, “I would be this bus driver!”
I immediately rang the bell that I should be allowed off that bus immediately, I have had enough!